Hater? Really?

I recently got labeled a “hater” by a person who has never met me and—as far as I can tell—does not understand my thoughts on the issue in question. It happened on Facebook. Somebody had shared one of those posts by a Foundation for This or That. The post took one side of the issue without concern for people literally losing their lives on the other side. I asked that we think about them, too, in what I tried to make a light-hearted manner. “Hater” was my reward.

I pastor a congregation in the Presbyterian Church (USA). This church is falling apart. And I insist that what's killing my church is not the issue everybody thinks we're fighting. On the surface we're fighting about the ordination of gays and lesbians to church leadership. (And coming soon to a Presbyterian Church (USA) congregation near you: an argument over gay marriage.) Sure, these issues divide, but I insist we're fighting something far deeper. We're fighting over whether we can see people with whom we disagree as beloved children of God.

Groucho Marx once said, “I would never join a club that would have me for a member.” Well, we all belong to the same club: humanity. Sadly, we all share the same fallen human nature. I give you a few examples of the consequences:

1. By FAR the biggest sexual sin I encounter in ministry is not homosexuality. Gay and lesbian issues almost never come up in the church I pastor. No, the “winner” is promiscuity. Sleeping around. It gives us adultery, broken marriages, teen pregnancies. All three have happened repeatedly in all three churches I have served.

2. Certain issues do not permit compromise. Even wise people of good will cannot find a middle ground. Gay ordination and marriage are good examples, as is abortion. Sadly, people who have strong opinions on these and others likely will have to find a church that takes the same sides they do.

3. Electronic communication empowers us to treat others with contempt few of us would dare to use were we talking face to face. Conservatives and liberals are equally adept at leaving carnage in the wake of their tweets, emails and newscasts. (Bill Maher and Rush Limbaugh have a lot more in common than either could admit, as do Fox News and MSNBC.)

I want to follow the example of Jesus when it comes to dealing with poopy people. As I read the Gospels, he stood up for God's truth AND he treated all kinds of people with loving respect. As a fallen human being, I will fail in this, but I hope to God I can find the spirit to keep trying. This is not weakness, but strength.

If you have read this far, don't know me, and do not know which side of the issues referenced I take (and believe me, I take one on every last one of them), good. Please think about what I have written, not which side I take.